Saturday, November 7, 2015

Browns QBs Have Lots of Kids

Work has been kicking my ass lately. By that, I mean that I get into the office around 6:30 AM and I leave around 6:15 to 6:30 PM.  It's made it difficult for me to find the inspiration or the time to write about cards or put any packages together to send out.

I'm hopeful that next weekend will be better, because tomorrow I'll be going into the office pretty early again and probably staying most of the day. Yup, that means I'll be missing my monthly card show at one location, but I have to do the work to be ready for what I have going on Monday and Tuesday.  I should be able to get to the other location of the card show next week, though.

Still, I've been sitting here without writing about the great pack of cards that I received from my Canadian pal Angus in Ottawa.  Angus is a Cleveland Browns fan.  To celebrate that, let's talk about some of the quarterbacks that Cleveland has had play for them in the time since they came back into the NFL in 1999.  

1.  Tim Couch

Tim Couch was the first overall draft pick in 1999. He played in the Air Raid offense run by Hal Mumme when Mumme came to Kentucky from Valdosta State University.  Mumme won fewer games at Kentucky than he had recruiting violations, and people in the NFL learned quickly that Couch was more Andre Ware (a system quarterback) than he was Peyton Manning.  Of course, Couch ended up a backup to Brett Favre for a year in Green Bay, so I can't hate on him too much.

On the other hand, Couch is married to former Playboy Playmate of the Year Heather Kozar. Quarterbacks always get the girls.

Relating to nothing I've just talked about, here are a couple of O-Pee-Chee cards that Angus sent my way:

The 1978 Sixto Lezcano is just awesome.  Sixto was always a favorite, but he declined pretty quickly when he was traded away in that big trade after 1980 in which Milwaukee picked up the next two American League Cy Young winners -- Rollie Fingers and the Cardinal-clad Pete Vuckovich.
Let's not forget the gingerbeard man, Roy Howell.  The man had hands of stone at third base and a bat made of licorice.  What a great free agent acquisition that was.

2.  The Ex-Packers: Doug Pederson & Ty Detmer

Tim Couch was hurt frequently and ineffectively even more frequently during his time in Cleveland. Backing him up were two former Green Bay Packers.  Couch's first year in Cleveland, it was Ty Detmer. Detmer started two games in 1999.  The next year, Doug Pederson. 

Since we're talking about wives and families and all, here's Ty Detmer with his family.

Not to be left out, while dad Doug is the Kansas City Chiefs offensive coordinator, son Drew is a quarterback at Samford University in Alabama.  

Yeah, I don't know what's going on there on his upper lip either.

Once again, in the realm of nonsequiturs, this is one.  Here are a few more O-Pee-Chee gems from Angus.

And these four cards go right into their respective player collections.  I just wish that O-Pee-Chee would have translated the word "Brewers" into French as well -- like the recent "Cerveceros" uniforms for the Latino.  Plus, the word is brasseurs, which sounds a bit like a porn website.

But don't click that link. Or ask why I know that.


Let's move on.

3.  Spergon Wynn


4.  Kelly Holcomb

Kelly Holcomb -- like Doug Pederson -- is the product of a non-SEC southern football program (Holcomb is an MTSU Blue Raider, Pederson was a Louisiana-Monroe Warhawks. Apparently, being the quarterback for the Cleveland Browns leads to large families as well. You see Ty Detmer's four daughters in the photo above; he's an underachiever compared to Kelly Holcomb and his wife's six children -- including twins born in 2009.  Holcomb is now a volunteer high school football coach back in Murfreesboro, TN, at the high school his daughter cheers at -- Riverdale.

Which O-Pee-Chees go with Kelly Holcomb? Well, there is a such thing as a sort of mediocre but still acceptable OPC.

Mediocre but acceptable O-Pee-Chee would describe these from 1991.  O-Pee-Chee got lazy on us, or, perhaps, Topps got more difficult to deal with and required OPC to use the Topps logo on the front. The only thing differentiating these from Topps is the cardstock used (white) and the bilingual backs.

5.  Luke McCown & Josh McCown

O Brother Where Art Thou?  If you're a McCown brother, the answer is probably Cleveland. In the tradition of Browns QBs, the McCown brothers are prolific in having many children. Josh and his wife Natalie have four children -- two boys & two girls -- while Luke and his wife Katy have six children -- four boys and two girls:

So, if you're keeping track, that's what -- twenty kids from four Browns QBs? Must be the Cleveland weather.

To go with this, how about a few more O-Pee-Chee?

Rob Deer goes right into the player collection.  Rollie Fingers -- well, actually, that might be an extra one of this card.  And Tiny Felder.  He was cool.  I mean, look at his wristbands with his number prominently displayed.  I actually asked Michael Felder a/k/a "In The Bleachers" one time if he was any relation to Tiny -- since they share a name and Tiny did play for the Astros for a little while.  They aren't related as far as Michael knows.

6.  Johnny Manziel

You would have thought that Cleveland learned its lesson in drafting SEC Quarterbacks with Tim Couch...or signing former Auburn Tiger Jason Campbell...or playing former South Carolina Gamecock Connor Shaw.  But, no. They went out and drafted Johnny "Football" Manziel.

Even better for this blog, Manziel is a party animal who has successfully parlayed his quarterbacking ability into getting women far hotter than any weasel-looking guy should get. 

Like Lauren Hanley.

Or Colleen Crowley:

Or Sarah Savage:

I mean, really. I get that the guy has money and is reasonably famous and loves to party, but he is not a good looking guy.

Anyway, for Browns fans like Angus, I hope Manziel can turn it around. For every other reason, I really hope Manziel fails in the ways that he has failed already on many occasions.

What's left to show off?  How about more O-Pee-Chee? No? You're tired of it?  Okay.

Topps Tribute of two PC Guys in Warren Spahn and Paul Molitor will do just fine!  

Angus, as always, you have blown me away with your generosity. I hope your Cleveland Browns collection multiplies in ways reserved usually for Cleveland Browns QBs!


  1. Replies
    1. I figured that I had enough guys who played for Green Bay and Cleveland!

  2. That Spahn is nice, that Hanley's not so bad either

  3. Haha, weasel-looking! I'll never be able to unsee it now.

  4. Couch. Holcomb. Manziel. Ouch.

    Kozar. Hanley. Crowley. Yum.