Cards from Neosho Drive Me to Drink

I have lived in Georgia now for nearly 21 years. I have lived some place other than Wisconsin for 25 of the past 26 years. What that means is that, for the most part, I have finally rid myself of my Wisconsin accent. It took quite a bit of time, but eventually I got over some of those verbal ticks. 

Like some of those described (and heard) in this video.

I probably still have some of these issues, but I learned a few things about my own speech and the speech I hear when I go back to Wisconsin. It makes me laugh, though, to hear it.

Recently on Twitter, I got in an exchange with a recent addition there -- a fellow who goes by the name of Brewers Signatures. He asked me if I wanted some cards that no longer fit his collection that are all Brewers cards. So, in honor of these cards coming from Neosho -- which is not far from where I grew up -- I thought I'd go all in on celebrating Wisconsin and its drinking.

I know -- how terrible to celebrate alcohol? Right? If you think that, well, you've never lived in Wisconsin.

1.  Wisconsin Is a Drunk Place ... Everywhere

Recently, a list of the twenty drunkest cities in America came out. These cities were identified by self-reported binge drinking and heavy drinking rates using various health studies. Of the top 20, TWELVE were in Wisconsin -- and 6 of the top 7 were. In order from bottom to top: 17. Milwaukee/Waukesha/West Allis; 16. Janesville/Beloit; 15. Racine; 12. Sheboygan; 11. Wausau; 9. Eau Claire; 7. Fond du Lac; 6. LaCrosse/Onalaska; 4. Madison; 3. Green Bay; 2. Oshkosh/Neenah; and 1. Appleton.

Only one other state -- North Dakota -- had more than one location (Fargo & Grand Forks, but, then again, that is almost all of North Dakota).

So, what drives me to drink? Panini Prizm. Actually, there were quite a few very colorful parallels from 2012 -- it looks almost Christmasy with these two cards together! 

Martin Maldonado (Twitter: @Machete1224) has hung around Milwaukee as Jonathan Lucroy's backup since coming up in 2011 for one plate appearance. Maldonado is not beyond help as a hitter, to be fair -- he tends to hit a few homers and draws some walks at times. Still, he'd be stretched as anything more than a backup based on the 918 plate appearances he's made to date. He's 29, and he's arbitration eligible after this season. He may leave town merely because of that, or he may stick around and bridge the gap between Lucroy and Jacob Nottingham.

2.  Lewis Black on Drinking in Wisconsin (NSFW)

This Lewis Black standup is entirely one that could only be done in Wisconsin. Only people in Wisconsin -- or people who have gone to Wisconsin -- can understand what he means. One funny line is him wondering what it is that Wisconsin people do on New Year's Eve considering how much they drink the rest of the year. It's worth a listen to understand my people.

Personally, I had to give up on that. First off, it's just not as easy to rebound from a night of drinking when you're in your mid-40s as it was back in my 20s. Second, I moved from Wisconsin at the ages of both 18 and 23, so the locals there will say that I got out of practice. Third and most importantly, I use my brain too much for work. I have to be able to think. So, for me, it's weekends only at best for a drink -- except, perhaps, if I meet up with friends for one or two drinks on a very rare occasion.

Yes, more 2012 Panini Prizm Parallels. To be fair, the parallels look much better than the base cards do. The base cards -- all silver borders everywhere -- are flat out ugly. The colors at least cover up the lack of logos here. 

The more I see these parallels, the more they are almost acceptable. The real problem with Panini Prizm Parallels -- besides the alliteration, of course -- is that they are more numerous than drunks in a Milwaukee bar on a Friday night. Just like the drunks, these parallels come in all shapes and sizes. And, just like the drunks, they all start to blend together after awhile.

3.  People in WIsconsin LOVE Brandy Old-Fashioneds

This is a rather normal sounding person making this drink. However, it's almost certain that this guy is from Wisconsin. It's practically the official drink of the State of Wisconsin. I mean, if you Google "Brandy Old Fashioned", the first link that comes up is from "Edible Milwaukee" and it's titled, "Wisconsin's (Un)Official State Cocktail."  Wisconsinites love brandy. Korbel Brandy says that they export 385,000 cases of brandy and fully one-third of their entire production -- 139,000 cases -- go to Wisconsin. 

Personally, I never made it to this drink. Perhaps I left the state too soon and got swallowed up by my high-falutin' gin bucks (gin and ginger ale with lemon juice). Perhaps it was that I never really tried one. It doesn't sound terrible, to be fair, but I'm not going to buy the stuff I need to make it for this weekend. Nope, I'll stick to my drink, thanks.

One last tri-color grouping -- this time of Robin Yount -- finishes off the Panini Prizms I got. This card looks far better with the colored outline than with the silver. In silver, Robin's bleached out -- the airbrushing annihilating the pinstripes and making it look like he's wearing his Robin Yount pajamas on the field. I say that because I don't think that is an old enough photo for Robin to have been wearing the mostly white home uniforms from the 1970s.

4. Tailgating in Wisconsin is Different

To people in Wisconsin, tailgating means three things -- cornhole, grilling brats, and drinking a lot of beer. It's not like a southern college football game, either. At a southern football game, the tailgating is sort of refined. People bring lots of food. Sure, there's beer, but bourbon fuels southern football. 

Plus, you would not see people in the South dressed this warmly and looking happy:

Nope. If it's below 40 degrees at a University of Georgia game, you're going to see me very cold and unhappy, like this:

Let's be clear. I'm pretty much a Southerner now, even if I am still a Brewers fan and appreciate these cards:



I am glad I grew up in Wisconsin. I am glad that I am a Brewers fan and a Packers fan. I'm also very glad that I left at age 18, found the South, found a place where winter doesn't last at least 5 months and snow doesn't fall in at least 6 months of every year, and where it is cold when it is below 40 degrees. 

But, I'm especially glad for great people like my new Twitter pal for sending me great Brewers cards to remind me what I left behind.

Catching Up with a Trade Post

Back on post #300, I put out an offer to everyone: comment with your collecting interests, then e-mail me your mailing address, and I would send out cards.  That post got a great response and led to me getting rid of a bunch of cards and getting a bunch of Brewers in return (even though I did not ask for a return package).  

One of the people from whom I heard was Jared from Catching Up with Collecting. Jared's interests in collecting are diverse -- everything from catchers Carlton Fisk, Gary Carter, Jason Varitek, and Jason Kendall, to his favorite teams -- he has five -- to a ton of Boston Red Sox stars.  I can relate to the love for catchers -- having played the position myself for a long time growing up, as my knees some days can attest -- so sending a package to him for me was relatively simple.

Jared then sent me a great stack of Brewers cards. Thankfully, the Brewers are not among his favorite five teams, so he sent me an awesome mix of cards.

We start with a passel of Robin Yount cards, including the card carrying Paul Molitor's praise for Robin as a teammate from the Panini Cooperstown set.  The bottom card is from the 2002 Topps Gallery set Heritage inserts.  At some point and between Cynical Buddha and me, we need to count up both the number of times that the 1975 rookie card gets used and, also, that photo of Yount from the 1988 season (with the H/K patch on his left arm to honor former manager Harvey Kuenn) that has been used so many times that I think it's the only photo Topps has of Robin.

While initially I liked this photo, it was because I was looking past the fact that a good third of the card is dominated by the out-of-focus arm of a first-base coach.  Now that I've really noticed it, I can't unsee it.  Dang it.

Topps Gold, circa 2013.  Hellweg came over to the Brewers from the Angels in the Jean Segura/Zach Greinke trade.  Hellweg is a graduate of St. Dominic HS in O'Fallon, Missouri. He had been rehabilitating from Tommy John surgery since early last year, and the Brewers used up his fourth and final option this year to let him continue his rehabilitation in Colorado Springs.  Before the injury, he -- and not Jimmy Nelson -- was probably the Brewers' top pitching prospect.

I'm not sure what's going on under Rob Picciolo's (pronounced "PEACH-uh-lo") eyes here. It might be the scan, or I just never cared enough to look at Rob Picciolo's 1984 Donruss card before. The very antithesis of a "Moneyball" player, Picciolo walked 25 times in 1720 career plate appearances.  

This card is proof that, in the 1980s, the card companies made cards for literally everyone who appeared in a major league game.  To wit, in 1983, Picciolo played in 14 games and came to bat 29 times.  No, he did not spend any time in the minor leagues that year.  In fact, because of his 1 sac fly in 1983, his OBP was lower than his batting average -- a .222/.214/.333 slash line.  

Josh Prince currently has more cards in the 2013 Panini Prizm set (10, including all the parallels) than he does major league plate appearances (9, racked up in 2013).  Prince was on his way back down the Brewers' chain after that high point in 2013 -- appearing only in Double-A Huntsville in 2014.  He's now a Double-A player in the Detroit system with Erie.

Tyler Wagner pitched for the Runnin' Utes of Utah in college before the Brewers drafted him in the fourth round in 2012.  He has worked his way up in the system step by step.  In 2014, he pitched very well as an age-appropriate player in the Florida State League, and he has started off well with the Biloxi Shuckers this season.  

As an aside, the Brewers moved their Double-A team from Huntsville, Alabama, to Biloxi, Mississippi, in the off season.  The only problem: the Biloxi stadium will not be ready for the team to occupy it before May at the earliest.  As a result, the Shuckers opened their "home" season by playing five games in four days last week against Jacksonville in Jacksonville. They will also be playing "home" games in May 6 against the Mississippi Braves at the Braves' home stadium in Pearl, Mississippi and the team will reappear in Huntsville for some home games starting on May 16.

In case someone with the Shuckers is reading blogs, please remember I am both a Brewers fan and a construction lawyer with good connections in Mississippi.  No, I'm not advertising, I'm just saying.

These Hometown Heroes cards with the dark blue uniforms are not nearly as offensive-looking to me as the powder blue one that Robin Yount is wearing.  Note that the Sheets parallel is the elusive "ZIP Code" parallel, as Panini shows off its knowledge of major league zip codes.  The great thing is that I believe I need all of these for player collections.  

Martin Maldonado is now the Brewers starting catcher as Jonathan Lucroy heals up after suffering a broken toe.  Maldonado has never been much of an offensive force.  Even after spending parts of 2004 through 2012 in the minor leagues -- a total of 1965 plate appearances -- he totaled only 31 home runs and 71 doubles for a .333 SLG.  But, he has one hell of a cannon behind home plate:

The guy threw out Billy Hamilton on a pitch he had to short-hop out of the dirt.  It's his defense that keeps him in the league, but he's stretched if he has to play regularly.

I'm still thinking, though, that Panini needs to do the "Catchers of Major League Baseball" series.  No logos needed!

And, if Panini did a set like that, I guarantee that both me and a certain Jared from Catching Up With Collecting would go for the complete set.

Thanks, Jared, for the great cards!